Gittin 7 - To fight the bad or not to fight
One should never be too assertive with the members of his household; if he is, they will lie to him out of fear and lead him to multiple sins. For example, Rabbi Chanina ben Gamliel used to put fear into his servants, and they fed him a prohibited thing. What happened? A part of a properly slaughtered animal was lost, and they substituted it with another, cut from a live animal.
But is it possible that a righteous Rabbi Chanina would eat anything not kosher? God watches even over the animals of the righteous, like in the story where a donkey would not eat food from which tithe was not separated, how much more so over the righteous themselves? - True, they wanted to feed him a prohibited item, but something prevented this.
Mar Ukva sent a question to Rabbi Elazar, "There are bad people who hurt me, and I can give them away to the government, should I?" Rabbi Elazar took out a piece of parchment, made lines for writing and wrote, " Let me not do wrong with my mouth with an evil person is in front of me ." Mar Ukva replied, "But they are torturing me!" Rabbi Elazar then wrote, " Be silent unto God, and the enemies will disappear. " Rabbi Elazar's words took effect right away, and the enemies of Mar Ukva were led away in chains.
The Talmud then discusses why, according to Mar Ukva, a meal can be accompanied by joyous music only if it is a meal connected to a mitzvah, as well as other signs of diminished joy, decreed after the destruction of the Temple.
Art: Wedding Dance by Pieter Brueghel the Younger